Change.
Change is scary. Change is hard. Change is exciting. Change is...
Change is something relatable to everyone, anywhere, any time. We all have to go through change, not just once, but multiple times within our lives.
But why is change scary? Why is it hard?
While it can be exciting- like a new job, moving to another country, starting a new relationship-there is always an element of fear even when it is a good change.
But there are also extremely hard changes-like the loss of a job, a home, a loved one-and grief is mixed in with the fear.
What is it that we are afraid of exactly?
Probably, if we are being honest, there are many things we are afraid of, but it all boils down to the fear of losing control. We have no idea what this change will bring. We have no personal experience, no memory, no background to inform us on how this change will affect our life. Therefore, we have no sense of security with no foundation of experience or memory to build upon. Our foundation seems anything but firm.
Who is really in control of our lives? And where does our security lie?
The day I moved into my university was an awful day for me. I was perfectly fine...for a while. I was determined that I would not lose control over my emotions. However, the closer and closer it got to my parents driving away, leaving me to live in a new place apart from them for the first time, the more and more my negative emotions began to escalate. I did not know what I would do without them. I had never before had to be a student, take care of my meals, laundry, shopping, go to church, serve, while still doing my best to maintain friendships with the people around me. How would I do it all on my own? Not only was I unsure of how I would manage everything, but I was afraid I would not have any deep relationships, that I would be lonely, that some awful catastrophe would befall me and I would not have my parents around to help me. I had never before known an existence where I lived three hundred miles away from them. What would I do? I had absolutely no sense of control or security that day nor for a few weeks after my parents left.
Thankfully, God is not human. He does not leave us. It was good for me to be separated from my parents in order for me to realize how much I depended upon them and placed all of my security in them, not God. Of course, God had given them the role of taking care of me as their child, but now as an adult, I needed to learn that my parents were human. They were not made to be my provider forever. I had to grow in my dependence upon God. Ironically, we never grow when we place all our hope in people and cling wholeheartedly to them, but we grow exponentially when we realize our need for the Lord and run to Him. Psalm 188:8 tells us that "it is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man." He is our ever-present Father who loves us and takes care of all of our needs, whether physical or spiritual.
As Jesus tells His disciples in Matthew 6, when we serve God who is the true provider and supplier of all of our needs, we do not have to worry about anything. Not what we eat, drink, wear. We do not have to worry about our bodies or our health. He says that our heavenly Father feeds even "the birds of the air" and clothes "the lilies of the field" (26, 28). Since he cares for even these things, He will care for us all the more because he knows that we need them (30,32). Though we know in our minds that God is our provider, when changes arise, we still find ourselves lacking faith, trust, and peace. Yet Jesus is saying that our proper response here is to trust in God. To not worry, not even about tomorrow, for "each day has enough troubles of its own" (34). There is no reason for us to worry, unless we do not trust that God is able or strong enough to be our firm foundation.
Just as I learned my first year being away from my parents, we must release the need to know and understand what will happen on the other side of change. Of course, it is natural to have fears, worries, and anxieties about what lies ahead, but I don't think anyone truly enjoys being in a perpetual state of worry, waiting for months until the change has become "normal" and what was once new has become just another routine. We waste so much time wondering what will happen when we could find peace, joy, and contentment throughout the entire process if we simply believed in the fact that God is in control. That He is our Father who cares about us and knows more about us than we know ourselves. That He wants us to come to Him and place our security in Him. My parents are imperfect human beings, but I easily placed my entire trust in them. Why can we not place our entire trust in the Lord who is perfect and all-knowing?
As Hebrews 13: 5-6 says, "Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.' So we can confidently say,
'The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?' (Hebrews 13: 5-6)
Here, Paul is again referring to that need for control that we have that often leads to greed or "the love of money," but we can be wholly content and unafraid knowing that He will never leave us. He is faithful. He is our helper. He is our firm foundation. After all, as the psalmist declares, "Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God" (Psalm 90:2). He has always been and always will be. Though our lives are never constant, He is constant through it all. He does not change.
Our lives are incredibly short, and a large portion of our lives are spent in the midst of change. Instead of filling our time with worries and anxieties about the changes in our lives and the unknown, may we declare to the Lord, "Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom" and recognize that life is short so we should spend it trusting in the Lord (Psalm 90: 12).
Let us grow by not allowing fear of change control our hearts and our minds, but push us to run to the one who has been and always will be our firm foundation.
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